Did Jesus Exist?

Have you ever had someone challenge you as to whether or not the man we call Jesus Christ actually existed?  Have you had doubts of your own about His existence?  Today I listened to a radio broadcast on the matter with Trent Horn from from Catholic Answers Live (click here for the article about it).  In it, Trent shares information and has conversations with callers on the topic of Jesus’ existence.  If you’re a Protestant listener who has issues with certain Catholic Doctrines – as I do – don’t worry!  The information shared is not from a “Catholic” perspective, and shouldn’t conflict with your beliefs in any way.  This audio file simply shares information that you will undoubtedly find interesting and useful on the topic of Jesus’ existence.

Click here to listen:

After listening:

  • For more information on the writings of Jewish historian Flavius Josephus on Jesus, you might find this wikipedia article interesting.
  • For more information on the writings of Roman Historian and senator Tacitus on Jesus, you might find this wikipedia article interesting.

“Donny, Why Do You Argue So Much?”

“Donny, why do you argue so much?” (Spike TheBarber‘s question has been paraphrased).

We’re all influenced by our past. My mom (who is my friend on Facebook and will see this and be okay with me saying it) was very loud growing up. She was a stay-at-home mom who dedicated every waking moment to my brother and I. Arguments in our home were not taken the same way arguments are taken by others – I simply don’t see them the same way some people see them. To me, it’s just another form of communication. Regardless of the decibel level, I never had any doubt that my mother loved me. I never took long-term offense to the things that were said in screaming matches. My mother and I have many issues between us, but neither of us doubts the love we have for each other.

I would prefer to call it “discussing,” but feel free to label it “arguing” if you must. It’s a HUGE part of how I process, how I share and how I LEARN. I’m not called to be a Pastor. I’m Donny. When invited to speak, I talk about porn and God’s grace and forgiveness… things He has done for me (and you). On Facebook and blog posts/comments, I talk about theology based on what I’ve learned and studied. I’m not your pastor or counselor. I’m Donny. I’m not a leader, as some seem to believe. I’m Donny. I once led a shockingly sinful lifestyle, by human standards, from which God has brought me out. “By human standards” are the key words in that last sentence. By God’s standards, your sin is just as “shocking.” Being pulled out of the stinky pit I was in doesn’t make God’s grace for me any greater or less than His grace for YOU. I’m amused, and admittedly more than a little flattered, that some people seem to be fascinated by what has happened in my life.

If I say something to you that you find insulting, just know that 5-10 minutes from that time I’ll be ready to give you a hug, buy you a beer (root, if you’re Pentecostal and against drinking – LOL) and talk about the 49ers. Some of the people I love most have heard very insulting things escape my lips. Only two exceptions: my son Caden, who has never once experienced my voice raised to him, or harsh words aimed at him, and my Pastor Bill, who has so much of my respect that I simply can’t insult him – I can’t put into words what Bill and his wisdom has done for me. Every other person I care about has probably experienced my sharp tongue (and it’s not that I don’t respect them, too… I can’t explain it).

An admission: I get even more “argumentative” than normal when under stress, and I feel like I’m under an EXTREME amount of stress right now. When it passes, I’ll write about it (don’t I write about EVERYTHING? LOL). It might pass by this time next week, or it might drag on for months… I just don’t know. Pray for me.

Know this: I love Jesus. I’ve never been so sure in my life that I want to be sold out for Him. Fortunately, who HE is has no bearing on how argumentative Donny Pauling happens to be. Thank God for that. :)

 

PS:  I’ve actually gone to counseling and discussed this part of my personality with a psychiatrist, which helped a bit…

My First Flight in a Powered Paraglider (PPG)

More than 10 years ago, I took a short flight in a Powered Parachute, which is a bit different than a Powered Paraglider.  At the time, friends of mine wanted me to purchased the ‘chute so they’d get a discount on a purchase of their own.  I didn’t do it.

Today (since it’s now 2:42am PST on Friday I guess it was technically yesterday), Dave Jewell from Blue Sky Powered Paragliding took me for my first flight in a PPG.  The video footage can be seen here – and I’d recommend watching this entire 7 minute clip, because some cool things happen (like flying right beside birds, popping up over the top of fishermen and scaring off a fox that was after a raccoon dinner):

For $60.00, Dave takes you up for a 20 minute flight.  My flight lasted a total of 30 minutes, however.  It was a blast!

20 minutes might not sound like enough time, but I’d have to say, the flight I took was just right.  I was ready to land.  Most of Dave’s customers are from outside this area, typically ranging from Sacramento to Chico, California.  In my opinion, it’s worth the drive from anywhere in Northern California to experience this.  If you live between Redding and Sacramento, I suggest giving Dave a call!  A flight like this also makes an excellent gift!

Was Peter the Rock Upon Which the Church was Built?

I’ve made no efforts to hide the fact that I’d love to convert to Catholicism.  I love many things about the Catholic Church.  The problem is that I will not pretend to believe things I don’t actually believe.  I have a hard time with the importance given to Mary.  I cannot accept the doctrine of Papal Infallibility.  Scripture indicates that Baptism is NOT necessary for salvation, but Catholic belief is that it is.  Catholics also believe that we are justified by works, whereas I’m convinced that scripture shows that we are justified by faith, that our justification has nothing to do with what WE DO, but everything to do with what JESUS DID.

And then there is the Catholic belief that it is THE Church Jesus built.  This claim is made in the following way:  Jesus told Peter that he (Peter) was the rock upon which He’d build His church (and Catholics believe Peter was the first Pope – perhaps I’ll get to that claim another time, because it’s not necessarily true).  The verse used to back up this claim is from Matthew 16:18:

Matthew 16:18: And I say to you, that you are Peter, and upon this rock I will build my Church, and the gates of Hell shall not prevail against it.

But wait… let’s read more of that passage starting back at verse 13 and going to verse 20:

When Jesus came into the region of Caesarea Philippi, He asked His disciples, saying, “Who do men say that I, the Son of Man, am?” So they said, “Some say John the Baptist, some Elijah, and others Jeremiah or one of the prophets.”

He said to them, “But who do you say that I am?”

Simon Peter answered and said, “You are the Christ, the Son of the living God.”

Jesus answered and said to him, “Blessed are you, Simon Bar-Jonah, for flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but My Father who is in heaven. And I also say to you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build My church, and the gates of Hades shall not prevail against it. And I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven, and whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.”

Then He commanded His disciples that they should tell no one that He was Jesus the Christ.

There are a few things that indicate Jesus is not calling Peter the rock upon which He will build His church, but instead calling Himself that rock.  First of all, it should be known that Simon Bar-Jonah was called Peter long before this.  When Jesus first met Simon-Peter, He said he would be called Cephas, which is Aramaic for “rock” or Peter, which is Greek for “rock.”  Back to the passage in Matthew 16:

  1. In the original language, the word Petros was used when Jesus called Peter by name (“you are Peter”), but petras (notice the change) was used when He mentioned the rock upon which He would build His church.  In other words, Jesus seemed to be telling Peter he was strong like a rock, and congratulating him on recognizing who Jesus was, then going on to say that He would be building a church on Himself.
  2. Ephesians 2:19-22 sheds some light on how Paul understood things: “Now, therefore, you are no longer strangers and foreigners, but fellow citizens with the saints and members of the household of God, having been built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, JESUS CHRIST HIMSELF BEING THE CHIEF CORNERSTONE (rock), in whom the whole building, being fitted together, grows into a holy temple in the Lord, in whom you also are being built together for a dwelling place of God in the Spirit.”

#2, along with the change in Greek words in the Matthew 16 passage, make it pretty clear who the rock is upon which Jesus will build His church.

1st Corinthians 3:11 also makes it clear that Jesus is the foundation (it reads, “For no one can lay any foundation other than the one already laid, which is Jesus Christ.”). Also, David tells us about Jesus being the rock upon which the church will be built, back in Psalm 118:22 where he wrote, “The stone the builders rejected has become the cornerstone (rock).”

We also need to consider this: in the Matthew 16 passage, building His church was a yet-future work of Jesus, for He had not yet started the process. He said, I will build (future tense) My church, but His mission for the nation Israel had to be concluded before another mission could be set in motion. This is probably why Jesus said not even the gates of hades would overcome this mission. Jews would understand hades’ gates to refer to physical death. When He stated that the gates of hades would not prevail against it, Jesus was therefore telling the disciples that His death would not prevent His work of building the church. On Himself. The Cornerstone. He knew He would be crucified and resurrected, but that would not stop Him from building His church on the rock (Himself).

But what about that part where Jesus gives Peter The Keys to the Kingdom?   Peter was told he would possess the keys and be able to bind and loose, forgive sins, etc. However, those same keys were given to all the Apostles.  John 20:20-23 says, “Then the disciples were glad when they saw the Lord. So Jesus said to them again, ‘Peace to you! As the Father has sent Me, I also send you.’ And when He had said this, He breathed on them, and said to them, ‘Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained.’“

One very common thing that Catholics seem to believe, at least when I’m discussing things like this with them, is that the early church was uniform in belief and tradition right up until the splits around 1000AD.  The truth is that the early church was NOT uniform. It was quite diverse right up until Constantine became a Christian. After that, those he favored were given more power and possessions. Those he didn’t faded away, and many of their writings were destroyed. That’s an historical fact. The church was-not-uniform despite what Catholic teaching wishes to be true. There were disagreements right from the very beginning.

Even when the disciples walked with Jesus, their understandings varied. That didn’t magically change after He ascended. In fact, the Gospel of John is believed to have been inspired by John’s need to correct some of the things Thomas believed. Other early Christians argued all the time, which is why you see people being labeled heretics in the first century. That doesn’t mean they necessarily WERE heretics, mind you… it just means that one person or group held a position or positions that was at odds with the beliefs of another group.

In conclusion, scripture seems to make it clear that the rock upon which Jesus built His church is… HIMSELF.

Another Conversation with a Former Model

If you are thin skinned and can’t deal with language similar to that used in your favorite R-rated action movie, you don’t want to read this post.

Yesterday I received an email from a girl who worked for me when I was still in the adult industry.  The work she did for me has reared its head again in her life, and she thought I was behind it, sharing her photo content again. We’ve been emailing back and forth.  The conversation continues.

With her permission, I’m going to share parts of our email conversation with you.  I’ll highlight a few things that I think really say more than the words she used.  This is what porn really is, my friends…

Donny,

After doing a little research of my own, I soon learned that you have some affiliation with ******* here in Redding. I wanted to remind you that I did some nude shoots with you and your girlfriend Belinda about 10 years ago. I understand that my photos are available on the internet for anyone to look at, or save for that matter. However, I also know that it is with great detail that you may even find me on these various websites after all of these years. You would really have to search or have specific information about a model to actually find these photos now. At the time, I was interested in taking photos and exploring my individualism, and the money was decent for an 18 year old. Unaware at the time that my photos would be posted on a LOCAL website, I continued to shoot with you two. It was only after the trip to Baltimore that you sent me on, that I realized this was something that was no longer fun, or anything I wanted to do. I had the most awful experience there and was tricked into doing things that were not in my contract. Granted I did voluntarily go alone on this trip, I really did not have anyone to turn to while across the US. I was scared, and I felt betrayed by you. I recall you saying that the photographer was incredibly sweet and would make me feel comfortable. That was obviously not the case, so I decided that I did not want to shoot with you anymore.

For a couple years after I stopped, my photos started popping up in places, parties, friend’s phones, Myspace. I was humiliated. I went through a lot of judgment and ridicule. I was under the impression that the photos I was taking weren’t for local websites. After two shitty years of dealing with bullshit, to my own doing, I finally came to a place where I wasn’t ashamed anymore and I felt good about myself. Every now and again I would come across some asshole that still had my photos saved somewhere, a little fucking creepy and pathetic if you ask me. I mean, these photos are almost ten years old!

Recently, it has come to my attention that my photos are being shared again. Weird, it’s been 10 years, but it still feels like yesterday. I then put together that it was in fact you sharing my photos. You are the fucking creepy and pathetic asshole still sharing my photos after all these years even after I shared with you my personal struggle.

I am appalled at your actions, we’re both adults and I am even more surprised at your blatant disrespect for young women. I learned the hard way. I can only imagine how some of the other girls felt after growing up and realizing that they made huge mistakes. We can only rely on the hope that you and Belinda were decent people and as time went on these photos would disappear in some way. But no thanks to you, they have resurfaced causing a lot of pain in my life. I am disgusted, you have two daughters. How would you feel if they made mistakes in their life and someone like their father was making them relive their ultimate humiliation? Oh wow, just found you on Facebook and you’re a changed man huh? Christian! I call bullshit, I am even more disgusted with you!

In my reply to that initial email, I assured her it wasn’t me sharing her photos again.  A later message indicated why she thought it must be me (some of the photos were from a site that still exists, and bears the name I used to use).  After a bit of discussion, she wrote, “Ok I believe you. It’s possible that your name was used because of your previous affiliation. I’m sorry to come at you in attack mode, I have just been dealing with some unnecessary bullshit. Thank you for responding.”

I let her know that I’d be happy to help in any way possible.  If someone was using her photos in an illegal way, I could definitely help do something about it.  Her response also shares what went on in Baltimore (the bad experience mentioned above).  WARNING:  this part makes a brief reference to acts that some might find too graphic.  I’m leaving that in the post, because porn is what it is…

I don’t think anyone is using my photos illegally. I think they just have them saved somewhere or are able to access them. There was a sales guy named *****, not sure about his last name, who was taunting my ex with them. Your name was brought up, but it is possible that he was referring to the website (*****). In the past there were a couple of guys that claimed they knew you, but again, could have been lying. I will look more into it. I wish I could erase the photos from Baltimore. On that trip I was young and scared as it was. I couldn’t complete the fisting shoot, it hurt so bad and so I started to cry. He became frustrated with me and thought that if he talked dirtier that it would somehow help? But it made it worse. He then pulled me aside and told me that I would not get paid if I didn’t do it, and that I would be wasting his time if I couldn’t cooperate. It just wasn’t me. As far as I know, no one is claiming to be you. Thank you, I’m glad that you turned it around. I think when I was younger, I just saw dollar signs and thought my open-mindedness was of something different than it really is. OR I have grown up, who knows. Either way, I half-expected it to follow me forever in someway, and for that I am responsible.

I was able to apologize.  I’m so happy to have the opportunity to do so.  Her response was, “I really appreciate your apology, it truly means a lot. Thank you so much.”

My friends, when looking at porn, do you ever stop to think that the girl on the screen is someone’s beautiful daughter?  You wouldn’t want anyone to look at the content if she was your daughter.  Why is okay when it’s someone else’s daughter?

The Uniqueness of Christianity

Where else can a person who causes unimaginable destruction, in so many ways, and who has no possible way of paying for all the bad things he has done, be completely forgiven? What hope would such a person have, outside of Christ? And without hope, won’t that person just keep causing destruction? If there is no way out, why not? Only because of Christ can such a person have their debt paid by God Himself. It has nothing to do with works. There is absolutely no way the “sinner” in this case can pay for his sin. He is helpless to redeem himself. His only hope comes from having his debt paid by another.

Legalism Kills

What if your little boy or little girl went to a park by river, and although you told them to stay away from the water, they didn’t obey you, and instead fell into the rushing current…

Would you be happy with strangers who stood in safety on the river’s banks, shouting at your child that they’re going to die because they didn’t follow the rules you’d asked them to follow? Or would you rather SOMEONE, ANYONE, jump in to save them?

God’s looking for someone to jump into the water and pull his children to safety. He’s not interested in someone who stands on the banks, screaming, “You’re going to hell!”